Thank
God the stuff I dig doesn't cost a lot. Everybody loves a bargain. But,
frankly, the things I wear and use to clutter my crib just aren't made any
more.

I'll find myself elbow deep in piles
of crap nobody wants in order to score some retro gem. Whether it's a blue
sharkskin suit, a Hawaiian shirt, or an ashtray with a naked lady on it, just
about everything I own has been pre-enjoyed, certainly with its own story to
tell: This statue of the Virgin Mary was precious to some old lady; he always
went fishing in this lucky hat; they're still best friends even though she made
her wear this orange bridesmaid's dress; somebody died in these shoes.

Thrift shopping is a keen study in
urban anthropology, whimsically illustrating fashion faux pas and passing
technological trends. Things like 8-track cassette players, console TVs,
Members Only jackets, and girdles are all remnants of our reluctantly revisited
past. Wading through it all is basically a scavenger hunt with a nominal toll
at the end, and a thrill when hitting the "it fits," "it's cool," and "it's
only 50 cents" trifecta. "People give away cool stuff they don't know is cool
but I do," says thrift shopper Meghan Taylor. And thrift shopping is not just
retro-cool. It's practical. "Fifty percent of my wardrobe is from thrift
stores," says thrifter Katie Rogers.

It would seem that the basic
approach to thrift shopping is similar to that of the Hail Mary pass --- browse
while hoping for the best. "It's cheap and you usually find more unique stuff
than you will at regular stores," says Amy Burdett. She needed a teapot and
scored one shaped like an eggplant for two bucks at the Vietnam Veteran's New
Image Thrift Store. Her pal, Cayla Cascini, unfortunately struck out in her
quest for "one of those cool skateboards with R2-D2 on the bottom."

They may specialize in unique
bargains with maximum kitsch appeal, but the primary intent of thrift stores is
to provide savings. These stores offer inexpensive items to those less
fortunate in order to raise money for various charities.

The majority of thrift shoppers is
not just there for fun. Citing welfare inadequacies, a 37-year-old mother of
four outfits her children at these stores. "Kids don't wear stuff out so quick
when they're young, 'cause they're growing so fast," she says while shopping
the West Avenue Salvation Army. "Some of it's like new." The sad reality, after
the flash and glamour of the kitsch and cool, is that I'm poor too. But thanks
to thrift stores, I'm well-dressed.