What started out as a fun, campy distraction has quickly deteriorated into a complete clusterf**k. "Surreal Life: Fame Games" gives "The Surreal Life" gang --- Hollywood has-beens desperate for a few last gasps of notoriety --- a "Real World/Road Rules Challenge" spin, as the C-listers compete in various fame-related games to win a $100,000 grand prize. The first few episodes separated the 10 players into two groups, the A-List (Rob "Vanilla Ice" Van Winkle; Sandy "Peppa" Dennis; CC DeVille from Poison; porn star Ron Jeremy; and Playboy TV personality Andrea Lowell) and the B-List (Verne "Mini-Me" Troyer; ex-wrestler Chyna Doll; Brigitte Nielsen; Traci Bingham; Emmanuel Lewis). This episode the two teams competed�in a couple tasks, including a hotel-room destruction fest. The losing team had to put three of its members up for elimination, and that trio played in a mock game show; the person who lost got booted from the house.

So OK, no big deal. Easy to understand. The first half featured some�manufactured drama with Vanilla Ice freaking out over skanky women sleeping on his bed (he's married and doesn't want to ruin his reputation). The second half things got crazy annoying, as it became clear why we'll never see a celebrity version of "Survivor" or "Big Brother" --- these people are simply not as willing to debase themselves as regular, non-famous people are. Case in point: Chyna Doll. She was the B-List's ringer in the hotel bust-up challenge, and she totally threw it because she's either crazy, bored, or deluded enough to think that just walking into the room, changing sunglasses, and taking off her gloves mattered. This of course led her team to lose, which pissed off everyone except for Brigitte Nielsen, who also clearly does not want to be there. Those two and Verne -- who was brought on last minute after New Kid on the Block Jordan Knight balked 10 minutes into the first episode with some made-up story about a dead gramma -- go on the block. And when it comes to the elimination game, Brigitte tries to throw the game but actually ends up winning (...god, woman) and Verne clearly tries to eliminate himself too, but denies doing so. Verne loses, but Brigitte throws another fit and demands to go home instead. The producers let her do so. Thank god. I wished they'd gotten rid of�all three.

Here's the thing: these "celebs" (I use the term loosely) are here of their own volition. Nobody forced them into this. But if you look at Verne, Chyna, and Brigitte, they are bored, humiliated, and�just awful losers. But that's part of playing a game. You signed on to this, you're reaping the potential rewards. (In addition to the money, most of the people on this show who have a good attitude get a little bump in the Q rating --- I actually want to see Traci Bingham in something now, and I never would have said that before.) So suck it up! Instead, you're ruining my entertainment value by acting like total prats. Brigitte was the worst of the bunch, but Chyna and Verne are up there in terms of obnoxiousness. I've been skipping "Housewives" to watch this the past couple weeks, but I'm going to have to start rethinking that.