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March 1, 2007 at 8:58am

"Idol" 2007, part 15: Queens of the night

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The boys were on the upswing this week, so karmically the girls had to come down a tick. But just a tick.

Gina kind of disappointed me with "Alone." Heart is almost a goldmine on this show (this song totally turned around Carrie Underwood's run on the show two seasons ago), but Gina was all over the place in the beginning and really forced by the end. Simon also called her out for her strange costume choice, specifically her too-tight red prom dress. Gina needs to get it together.

Alaina butchered the Dixie Chicks' "Not Ready to Make Nice," and even worse, her physical performance was embarrassing. You guys, she mimed the words "round and round and round." She has no business being here and needs to go home tonight.

Lakisha sang one of my faves, "Midnight Train to Georgia," and was just super. She may have more legs than I initially expected, and in fact she shows off her gams with a short skirt Simon calls "distracting" (well, that and her salmon poncho). She didn't do the "woot woot!" hand pull, but I still love her. But I wonder: what happens when she inevitably runs out of strong black woman anthems?

Melinda's "My Funny Valentine" was unquestionably the best of the night. This girl is a star already, and if she got booted tomorrow could totally nab a record contract. (Also: great ass.) My issue with Melinda continues to be her very odd look, which I've decided comes from having an enormous melon head and no neck. But she is a delight!

Antonella did not address the nudie pics of her floating around the Net. No point, really, as she won't make Top 12. She did better than last week with "Because You Loved Me," but by the middle of the song she was all flat and shaky. Nerves? Who knows. When she was dressed down by the panel she got immediately dismissive and shitty. Antonella, that's not going to help your PR disaster. Send her back to Jersey already.

Jordin disappointed me this week too, singing that song from "Mulan" about reflections or whatever. I generally have little tolerance for songs from Disney musicals, and after seeing Ayla Brown rock this one last year Jordin just fell flat, literally and figuratively. She's so much better than this song.

Leslie, a.k.a. The Flaming Spazz, sang the exact same song that A.J. sang last night. Apparently it's Michael Buble or something, which explains why I don't know it. Leslie handled the intro better than A.J., but A.J. killed her on the ending. Sadly, I suspect the bad song may be the end of both of them. I'm really going to miss that spazz --- she reminds me of that woman from "Mad TV."

Stephanie picked Beyonce's "Dangerously in Love," and she has some strange breathing/phrasing issues. No idea what was going on there. But she sounded and looked terrific, and she's still my surprise contender of the season.

Haley hilariously selected "Queen of the Night" from "The Bodyguard." It'll make a nice farewell number for when she goes home tonight. Seriously, Haley --- who do you think you're fooling? You are in no way dangerous or edgy; it's like cotton candy pretending to be dark chocolate or something. And you're definitely not Whitney on the vocals. She got super pissy when Randy tells her as much, and whatever sympathy I had for her immediately evaporated. Look around you, Haley: You are totally outclassed. Deal with it. Go home to your blandly hunky fiancée.

Sabrina (who I keep forgetting exists, and is a dead ringer for an ethnic Jennifer Grey) closed out the night with a song that I think is called "All the Man That I Need," and which, taken out of context, is really dirty ("he fills me up"....giggle). She's not nearly as good as she was last week, and it's pretty forced in parts. But hopefully she'll be safe. I like Sabrina, but she's not particularly memorable.

Predictions:

Should go home: Alaina, Haley

Will go home: Alaina, Haley with Antonella or Spazz possibly taking one of those spots.

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