So I've done it: I've officially given up on "American Idol" this season. This is the first time in four years that I haven't watched the show religiously; I even suffered through the horrors of Taylor Hicks and Sanjaya, but I cannot get through this season. It's been two weeks now and I haven't watched a single second of the show. That's at least two hours per week I have back. I can read, write, whatever. It feels good. I feel...clean.

But I'll admit, this week was a test to my "Idol" sobriety. Dolly Parton - DOLLY PARTON! - was the guest mentor. She is like a god to me; an honest-to-gosh American treasure. And I'm sure she was amazing (how could she not be?). But ultimately not even Dolly could cause me to relapse.

I should be clear: I didn't give up on Season 7 because of the singing. I actually think this is the most vocally talented group they've had in a couple years, certainly better than last season, when chuds like Phil Stacey and Chris Richardson made it to the Top 6, and the utterly useless Blake Lewis made the finals. (Are you embarrassed by that yet, America? You really should be.)

No, I've given up because I realize that I just don't like fully two-thirds of the remaining contestants. They might be decent singers, but I don't think they're very good people. Or, at least, not particularly interesting.

I keep forgetting Jason Castro exists. In fact, I initially typed his name "Danny Castro." That's how little he stands out to me. I finally got past the dreds (they're still gross, but whatever), and I can see why preteen girls would find him cute. But this guy has no personality. The word I'd use to describe him is "dippy." That's not someone I can root for. Plus, he has that whole MTV reality show past that he never acknowledges, and I just don't believe a word that comes out of his mouth.

At first I was a fan of wee Ramiele Malubay, impressed by her big notes during Hollywood Week. Since then she hasn't once lived up to her promise, and often dresses like some deranged munchkin. Actually, that part I like. What I don't like is her constant doe-eyed, co-dependent shtick. She's so utterly pointless. Who is voting for Ramiele?

Kristy Lee Cook must keep getting the Cute Country Girl vote, because she's somehow still in this thing. She actually grew on me a little during her brutalizing of the Beatles catalogue (BTW, I think the repeating of that theme was what finally drove me away), not because of her terrible singing, but because she showed a little spunk during judging. Still, this girl is not a star. She will never be a star. She will never even be star-adjacent, like my beloved Kellie Pickler.

Syesha Mercado is a very pretty girl, and also possibly the most over-rated contestant in "Idol" history. I keep hearing people referring to her as the best voice of the season, and my reaction is: you have got to be kidding me. I can't count the number of contestants from previous seasons who have done her shtick so much better. Tamyra Gray? LaToya London? Vonzell Solomon? Nadia Turner? Melinda Doolittle? All of them belted out the R&B diva classics with actual skill and presence. Syesha just wades through the verse until she can belt out the chorus. Snore. I also find her to be dour and totally stuck on herself. She is totally that girl in the Drama Club who's sure she's going to be a star. I can't stand her.

David Cook is consistently praised for his originality, when in fact he's the most predictable contestant of the season. You know that every song will have some ironic value; you know that it'll start out slowly with him plaintively growling into the mic; you know that he'll strum poorly on his guitar; and then he'll break into a howl on the chorus, driving it home. Every time. He's also a self-important douche, the very definition of smarmy. Yuck.

Michael Johns is not half as talented, cute, or interesting as he thinks he is. I can barely even find the interest to finish typing this sentence. That's how little I care about him.

That leaves the only three contestants I remotely care about, Brooke White, Carly Smithson, and David Archuleta. I think they're all talented in very different ways, and I can see any one of them getting a recording contract when it's all over. (Carly already had one, whatever.) That said, I could only really see myself picking up the phone to vote for even one of them (David), and if that's the case - if at NINE CONTESTANT LEFT I only care enough to maybe vote for one of them - I just cant' justify watching this show anymore.

I leave open the possibility of checking in once we're down to the Final 4, especially if my three faves are still in it. (Doubtful; Carly is living on borrowed time.) But as of now, I'm done.