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November 20, 2008 at 9:43am

"Top Model": McKey to the kingdom

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McKey wins! This is the first time since Cycle 7's Caridee that I picked the winner from the very first batch of photos (before that it was Cycle 4's Naima). I'm thrilled that she won - she was by far the most modelesque of the Final 3, which ended up being oddly disappointing after a highly competitive Final 6.

It's funny; I always find "Top Model" finales at least somewhat anticlimactic. We zip through the commercial shoot, the Cover Girl campaign photo, an elimination (bye, Analeigh! I've already forgotten that you exist!), the big runway show, a second panel and portfolio review, and then finally, the winner is crowned. That's a lot to get through in 60 minutes, and I always feel like there's no drama to the proceedings. Not that there was much suspense this time anyway; after Analeigh got the boot for an embarrassing commercial there was no way Sam was taking this. Especially not with that runway walk.

Actually, both of the Final 2 sucked on the runway. I don't think that's ever happened in the history of this show - at least the runner-up knew how to work it, even if the winner didn't (see: Shannon vs. Adrienne in Cycle 1, Melrose vs. Caridee in Cycle 7). Setting aside Jay Manuel's ridiculous Pepto Bismol/Dr. Seuss contraption (although I did love when those bitches had to run up the hill - ha!), neither girl had any swagger or sex appeal. With Miss J on the panel there is no reason that they should be producing finalists with runway walks that bad.

Given the fact that her walk was kind of...wah-wah, McKey won on the strength of her portfolio alone. And it's a strong portfolio to be sure. McKey could be the first winner to finally make good - after 11 cycles - on "ANTM"'s alleged goal of producing a high-fashion model. She's got the face. She's got the body. She takes a damn good picture.

But in a way, McKey is the least likely winner in the show's history. Yes, even less likely than Whitney! Because she's actually modelesque, but also a giant weirdo. I mean, the girl beats on pillows, walks like a crab, wears outfits that look as though she's headed to the Ren Faire, and employs an occasional, implausible, vaguely European accent. Her reaction to winning? Not screaming or crying - she walked up to Tyra Banks and LIFTED HER OFF THE GROUND. Maybe I'm wrong; she's not a freak, she's a mutant, because you need super strength to pull that off. I sure as hell couldn't lift the woman.

When you look back at the season, consider how few of McKey's one-on-one confessionals were used. Consider how little we knew about her. Analeigh, Sam, Marj, and Elina got a lion's share of the attention, and somehow McKey got the win. I think Tyra and Co. realized that she came across kind of jittery and off-putting - even moreso than Marjorie, to an extent - but to their credit, that didn't stop them from giving her the title. And kudos to them. I sincerely hope it works out and that McKey actually makes it in the fashion world, where many of the past winners have failed. Because if Tyra has taught us nothing, it's that fashion loves a freak.

Can't wait til Cycle 12!

Comments for ""Top Model": McKey to the kingdom " (1)

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Susie said on Nov. 20, 2008 at 11:31am

Yes, this has been said many times, but if they are trying to make a high fashion model, why do they give them a Cover Girl contract and a seventeen cover? And then have the audacity to criticize a girl for being too commercial when they are giving them prizes in the commercial realm! OK. It just makes me crazy every year. At least McKey worked for both -- her CG photo was actually nice. Do you think she'll stick with McKey or go back to being Brittany someday (remember she was one of the ones who had to change her name first ep.)?
And, Eric, was that statement about needing to be a mutant to lift Tyra another comment on Tyra's weight? Tsk, tsk...that's SOO last season, er, cycle.

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