Not having true loves to bestow our amore upon, my two friends and I began the night with a Valentine of our dreams -- Johnny Depp. At the Cinema neither Johnny as the vengeful barber or Princess as the Kitty had any objections to being our Valentines, at least none that we heard. We then hit Lux to drown in our sorrows. Not really, but I've always liked that metaphor.

We arrived a bit after 9 p.m. As we walked in there was a red furry box with gold trim and black bead tassels with a sign reading, "Pick a Chip & Win!" We reached in and I got a "Tasty Treat," which was a small paper bag of candy. It felt like Halloween. Friend No. 1 got a "Surprise Prize" and got to pick from a box of toys. She picked an IQ Puzzle -- which none of us could do -- the rest of us agreeing we would have chosen the coconut-shaped mug. Friend No. 2 was disappointed that she only won two fortune cookies. But, as I kept reminding her, she had yet to open them and see what her fortunes were.

We then bellied up to the bar to order our Shots Through the Heart, but there were none. There weren't any conversation hearts either. Or Love Sucks pins. All, apparently, were on the way. We ordered substitute drinks and by the time we had finished, heart-shaped sweet tarts had been set on the bar in martini glasses. We were thinking that for next year, Lux is the perfect place for X-rated conversation hearts. As we left, we saw they had set out the bowl of pins, only this year they said Poop on U. Still, fitting.

We wandered around to the Keg for another drink and ran into a peculiar man named Rusty. He had a Ziploc bag with the paperboard cover from some parmesan and garlic microwave popcorn in it. When I asked what else was in it he instructed me to tell him my favorite color, and to come back in 10 minutes. OK...

When I returned he had made me a rose from purple and green napkins (he didn't have blue), complete with a scent, which he called "cotton blossom," but reminded us of bathroom disinfectant. He said if I didn't water it, it would last forever. Hey, they say it's the thought that counts, and I DID get a rose for Valentine's Day. Thanks, Rusty!

Next up: "Photography in Dubrovnik" at Gallery r.