Pin It

"Thank God she's annoying!" 

The pressure to be an ideal parent is enormous. We read the parenting books and magazines and observe critically, taking mental notes as others raise their kids. We cannot help imagining that our children will inherit our failings and that their tantrums now will lead to a future life of crime. It's not that we don't know how to ignore the small stuff; it's that we're too close. With our kids, all the small stuff seems big.

Wouldn't it be great if we could know that they'll turn out all right? Then we could relax our parenting posture, lose some of that incessant worry, and simply express faith in their abilities and strengths. After all, their strength is the big stuff. Unfortunately we can't know. Wait! What would happen if we just acted like they'll be OK? Could we just enjoy their frustrations and misbehavior, knowing that they are growing and learning in their own way? If we magically found that balance between vigilance and faith, we would surely be more poised and less reactive.

A mother and father were in my pediatric office the other day with their two youngest daughters. The older of the two has a difficult, profound, and unexplained developmental disability. They know that she is not going to be OK. We were concerned that her baby sister may be developing similar traits. At this 1-year-old visit, the baby showed so much physical, social, and language ability that we were all completely reassured. As she had a tantrum in the office, her mother, with relief and pride, exclaimed, "Thank God she's annoying!" Yet another gift in a small package.

In This Guide...


Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Latest in Families

More by Laurence I. Sugarman, MD

Browse Listings

Submit an event
3rd Annual Summer Sipping on the Patio @ Lake Shore Country Club

3rd Annual Summer Sipping on the Patio @ Lake Shore Country Club

Fun Science at the Lighthouse @ Sodus Bay Lighthouse

Registration required....

Genesee Valley Orchestra & Chorus @ GVOC

GVOC announces auditions for its upcoming 2018-2019 season. For more information or...

View all of today's events »

This Week's Issue

Cover Story:
The Pride Divide
Feeling excluded from the Rochester Pride festival, queer and trans people of color create their own spaces. read more ...

Tweets @RocCityNews

© 2018 City Newspaper.

Website powered by Foundation.